A Blog About Life or A Personal Goodbye in the Form of A Public Blog
This is a blog I knew I’d have to write someday, but one I really never wanted to write.
In life there are many people you will encounter, most of those people will have no impact on it, just a numbers game not a slight against them. A few of them will help you out, will move you further along your journey to wherever it is you are going, some on purpose so by sheer chance. In that small group that help you intentionally, there is an even smaller group that will do so at cost to their own selves, be it financial or in some cases physical and those people are special indeed. But see even in that group, you will find a tiny little subgroup of incredible human beings that are willing to not only do for you, not only do for you at a cost to themselves but are truly willing to sacrifice for you. It is a small group, very few if any two people will have the same group as that is how life works.
I know who my little subgroup is, I know the people in my life that have sacrificed for me when I was in need, I know that offered and I appreciate every single one who did. But there were three people whom did way more for me in life when I needed it, my grandparents. I lost my paternal grandmother during the first covid outbreak, it sucked and due to the restrictions in place I was unable to go to her services and that sucked. Then I lost my grandfather a year ago, give or take. That was hard as I had no relationship with my other grandfather so it was kind of hard to handle. But then in December I lost my maternal grandmother. My Grandma passing would suck at any time for anyone, I get that, but in this case she was so much more than a normal grandma.
See there was a time in my life when neither of my parents were fit to well parent, so for 6 years I lived with my Grandma, already in her fifties, now raising three of her grandkids. If not for her my sisters and me would of likely been dumped into the system, maybe never to see each other again, and well if that would of happened then you wouldn’t be able to read any of this because I write and run a publishing company with my older sister. If not for Grandma keeping us together and safe (in spite of the many, many, many, ma..you get the idea a lot of bad choices we made) we wouldn’t of made it out the other side to be able to tell stories and help other writers have a place to tell theirs.
A lot of times I say the smart ass line “The Nathan you know and love wouldn’t exist if not for” then say something almost non sequitur like Cadbury’s eggs or something only tangentially related like Legend of Zelda, etc. The thing is, the only thing I can say that honestly about is the people that have or have offered to sacrifice for me. Those are the only things that have truly made me who I am. My circle is smaller now and that sucks, but I have a duty to do some good with what I have been given and that is what I intend to do as best I can.
I love you Grandma Charlotte, you were so much more than just a grandma, you are Grandma, thank you for every single thing you did for us and I’m sorry we were such pains in the ass when we were growing up.
